Wednesday 27 December 2017

12 THINGS THAT MADE ME SMILE IN 2017

I am ending 2017 with a real sense of gratitude especially after writing a victory log. Despite all the challenges and setbacks of the year, I thank God for 2017 and here are a few things that brought a smile.

ZIKORANACHIDI MEANS SHOW THE WORLD THERE IS GOD

1. God mother to Zikora

At the beginning of the year, I had the pleasure of being God mother to my darling nephew Ziroka and flew all the way to Essex to be at his Christening. He's really grown into a fine young toddler like his brother Kamsi. We thank God.

MY CUTE NEPHEWS - KAMSI & ZIKORA

2.         Flew with Emirates

It was my first time of flying with Emirates and without even asking was upgraded to premium economy seat which was really comfortable. I also stopped briefly in Dubai for the 1st time but next time I'm hoping to step out and have a good shopping experience with my girlies. (My bucket list) Who's coming lol?

LOVE ME SOME LEG ROOM

3.         Visited Cardiff

I grabbed the opportunity to travel to visit Cardiff with my sister friend Ngozi on her  business trip.  It took 3 hours by train but it was worth it. It was wet and windy but a nice town and the people are friendly.

WITH MY GIRLIE FOR LIFE -  NGOZI

4.         Dad’s Memorial

Time really flies when you miss a loved one. I was fortunate to attend the 1st memorial service of my late father Austin Anukem in his local Catholic Parish in North London and a few months later, I attended his memorial in the village, Ezeogba, Emekuku, Owerri. Does grief ever get easier? No way. But I was smiling because my father is resting in perfect peace Amen. 

MAY HIS SOUL REST IN PEACE - AMEN


DADDY's GIRL


5.         Igba Nkwu

The next day was our traditional wedding, Igba Nkwu, which took place after 18 years of marriage in honour of my dad’s one year memorial. Nnobi people came to conclude the traditional rights and rightfully claim ''yours truly'' as their wife.

Read more about my Igba Nkwu story


IGBA NWKU


6.         Full Circle Wellness Solutions

I joined Full Circle Wellness Solutions Network mid year  and I'm very pleased to be part of this awesome group. There's lots of networking and life learning and just helping each other to reach for the skies.

JUST A FEW OF US FROM FCWS

7. Met My Twinny

I've met so many amazing women this year including my twinny Idu Okwuosa through Full Circle Network and she’s just a darling. We are born on the same day October 4th and the same year so that makes us twinnies. She’s a really lovely person and I’m glad to have her in my life.

GREAT WOMAN


8. SSM7 at EDC

I attended a four month program at Enterprise Development Centre which is part of Pan Africa University. This has been a great learning experience for me especially learning more about the Social Sector Industry and how to run your social enterprise or NGO like a business to remain sustainable.

I graduated from EDC this year and became a life member. I look forward to receiving more benefits from this investment and attending more programs. 



WE DID IT


10. Majestically Rare Events

We are positioned as a Corporate Events and Marketing company and although the year has been slow we were able to deliver some classy events . We are entering our 6th year in business and we look forward to delivering more high class events and marketing campaigns for our clients.


IHS TOWERS



WILD WEST THEME



SEE MORE ABOUT CORPORATE EVENTS 

11. High Impact Business Workshops

DELEGATES FROM LAST WORKSHOP

Our High Impact Business Growth workshop powered by Majestically Rare continued this year for the 3rd year running. A NEW social media module was introduced mid-year, which has received raving reviews from delegates. Watch out for NEW workshops in 2018.

12. Raising Confident Girls Initiative

MOTHER & DAUGHTER HANGOUT LEKKI

A world where every girl is confident is the vision for Raising Confidence Girls initiative. It is an NGO that is close to my heart and a movement I believe in strongly. Having struggled with low confidence once upon a time, I can clearly see how having strong confidence can make a difference in ALL areas of one's life. I believe it starts with your internal belief.

One outcome from EDC was applying the learning and making our NGO, Raising Confident Girls more sustainable and impactful.  Our hangouts and sales from our branded tees help our NGO stay sustainable. All proceeds or surplus always go back to the NGO for future projects.

MOTHER & DAUGHTER HANGOUT IKEJA

MOTHER & DAUGHTER TWINNY

We raised over 250,000 naira from our first outreach program and we are able to pay for 10 girls to complete the rest of the school year through Dreams from the Slums. It was such a great experience, visiting the girls and teaching them how to be confident and how to care for themselves. 

AJEGUNLE

TEACHING CONFIDENCE

I just want to say a special thanks to my team members and sister friends, Ladi Di, Damie Onasanya, Yinka Enahoro, Ifeoma Okoye Agbasi and Bonita Olugu from Raising Confidence Girls. We all do this on a voluntary basis but the rewards are priceless. Giving back makes us smile. You ladies are awesome and I love you dearly for your pure hearts. We plan to have more programs in 2018.

Click link to read more about 



That’s it for 2017. I loved writing this victory log because it made me smile. You should try it. Thanks for being a part of my journey and reading my blog posts. I write from the heart. I wish you all the happiness and heart’s desire for 2018. God bless you.

With love

RiRi

Wednesday 20 December 2017

A WORLD WHERE EVERY GIRL IS CONFIDENT

Whether she’s in an Ivy league college in North America or a state school in Ajegunle Lagos, every girl can choose to be confident.  Can you imagine a world where every girl is confident irrespective of her race, her tribe, her family status, her religion or what she has achieved? How would that world look to you?



CONFIDENCE

It literally means a feeling or a belief that you can do something well or succeed at something.  Many girls today lack confidence because they often feel that they are not good enough.  There are also external challenges from social media stories, peer pressure and excessive comparison which makes many girls feel inadequate about themselves.

In my journey of seeking confidence, I am of the belief that a girl who has this strong attribute will far outshine a girl who doesn’t in ALL areas of life. But that shouldn't be the case. The sky is bigger enough for all girls to shine together 



The 4 Golden keys below will help any girl (or boy) improve her inner confidence.

SELF LOVE

Let me start by saying self-love is NOT selfish. A confident girl loves herself but not in a boastful or arrogant way. You can often tell when a girl has self-love. She is not apologetic for who she is. She owns her space. She surrounds herself with goodness. Her experiences in life are often positive including relationships. A girl who has strong self-love will not put herself down because she knows that she is fearfully and wonderfully made. She also takes steps to look after herself by eating well and exercising. 

Busola is such a girl. She has no problems with standing up for herself and speaking against injustice. All her relationships are loving and healthy because she loves herself.


SELF KNOWLEDGE

A girl with self-knowledge is confident. She is aware of her strengths and her weakness but focuses more on her strengths. She also has a strong sense of identity and is less likely to do anything that she doesn’t want to do. 

Hauwa is such a girl. She is comfortable spending time alone to figure out who she is. She loves to read or go on courses that help her with personal growth. Because she is secure in herself she does not mind asking others for feedback. She doesn’t see any feedback as criticism rather she learns more about herself. She also doesn’t follow the crowd. She makes  good choices because she knows what is good for her.


CLEAR GOALS

A confident girl has a strong sense of purpose. From a young age she has been raised to set goals and to go for what she wants. A confident girls knows that goal setting is a good habit which will lead to success. 

Edna is 16 and loves tennis. She practices nearly every day and has even written in her journal that she will be a great tennis player. Her parents saw her passion from young and encouraged her. They also assist her in writing down other important goals for her life.


POSITIVE THINKING

A confident girl looks on the bright side of life. She expects good things to happen to her. She doesn’t make excuses for herself or blame her circumstances for where she is. She always believes in the best possible outcome.  She doesn’t worry about negative outcomes because her mind is focused on doing her best. 

Ada is a confident girl. She is great company because she is always positive. She thinks the best in others and you hardly hear her complaining. She is an optimist and believes that something great will always happen to her.


A world where every girl is confident is possible if a girl will love herself, know herself, have clear goals and think positively about herself. That is our vision at Raising Confident Girls. Find out more about us below. 

So that it’s from me for the year. I do hope you have found my articles useful or helpful. Please let me know in the comment box.
I wish you and your family a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Thanks for stopping by and please share with someone who may need it. 


Wednesday 29 November 2017

OH THAT SPIRIT OF ENVY

It's fair to say that most people have a tiny bit of envy every now and then. Yes we do.  Perhaps your best friend is quite smart and always gets A grades but you struggle to get a B. You look at her and say half jokingly, "I hate you lol".



As human beings it's natural for us to feel slight envy but for some people it's a major issue and it manifests itself in ugly ways. It’s often quite difficult to talk about envy because it is a weakness.

WHY ENVY?

Envy occurs when we lack a desired attribute enjoyed by another.  In females this shows itself up in a lot of ways, especially the desire to outshine the person you are envious of. Or sometimes you become so hostile towards the person without even realising. Social media inflames envy because often you see the very thing you are envious of. Envy is associated with pain and shame.

ROOT CAUSE
From all indications and my research, the root cause of envy is low self esteem. 

SIGNS OF ENVY

1. You stop being nice and become very critical to the person.
2. You start ignoring the person. 
3. You see the person as fierce competition.
4. You are not happy for them.
5. You no longer cheer them on.
6. Any admiration you once had for them can turn into disdain and even disrespect .



If the envy is directed at you and you are a sensitive person, you might take such behaviour personally. But don't. It has nothing to do with YOU but more about how they feel about themselves.  Just be confident in yourself. 



HOW TO HANDLE ENVIOUS PEOPLE

1. Keep excelling and don't make any apologies for being your best self.

2. Focus on surrounding yourself with people that love and accept you for who you are.

3. Avoid interactions with envious people. They will just infuse negativity in your life.

4. Have strong boundaries and keep them at arm’s length.  

5. Realise that you can't fix a person with envy issues.  It's a journey they will have to deal with themselves.

6. Pray for those who despise and that includes envious people because that's what they do: despise you. 

7. Do not dim your light but rather be positive wherever you go.




HOW TO GET OVER ENVY

1.  Acknowledge that you do have envy issues.  It's the quickest way to kill envy. 

2. Consider that your behaviour towards the person you envy might not be kind.  Be kind.

3. Compliment the attributes that you are envious about.

4. Work on your strengths. We all have something that we are great at. If in doubt ask your closest circle.

5. Work on your self-esteem. When you have High Self-esteem, you are less likely to have envy issues.

6. Finally remember that any negative emotion you have towards another person can cause sickness in your body, so deal with it fast. Seek peace.  Be at peace with everyone around you.
Envy destroys relationships. 




Hope this article helps somebody. Please feel free to leave a comment. I write this from the heart. Please feel free to comment and share with someone that it can help.

Previous Post
WHY SELF ESTEEM MORE IMPORTANT THAN CONFIDENCE

Thanks for stopping by as always

Saturday 25 November 2017

WHY HIGH SELF ESTEEM MORE IMPORTANT THAN CONFIDENCE


I believe that self-esteem is more important than seeking confidence because once you have high self-esteem you will naturally gain confidence.


WHAT IS SELF ESTEEM?

In conversation with friends, they believe that confidence and self-esteem are the same. But they are not. Self-esteem is your opinion of yourself and your worth. In other words, your perception of your value as a person.



Confidence is the belief in your abilities. Do you know that some people have high confidence and low self-esteem? Some have low confidence and low self esteem but our aim is to have high confidence and high self-esteem in all areas of our life. Its a journey.

Here are a few more things about high self-esteem that I have discovered

When you have high self-esteem, you won’t have toxic relationships. You just won’t tolerate them. You will only surround yourself with goodness.

When you have high self-esteem, you won’t stay in places or groups where you are not valued, rather you will seek healthier environments.

When you have a high self-esteem, you won’t believe that other people are better than you or vice versa.



TRUE CONFIDENCE

It doesnt come from wealth, education, achievements, looks, accolades, designers or anything external. That is why unfortunately some people who have signs of outward confidence are struggling with low self-esteem, even celebrities. True confidence comes from high self-esteem.


Here is a checklist of a person who possesses low self esteem

     You don’t believe in yourself
     You see yourself failing before you begin.
     You have a hard time forgiving your mistakes.
     You believe you can never be as good as you should be or as others.
     You are afraid to show your creativity because you will be ridiculed.
     You are dissatisfied with their life.
     You complain and criticize.
     You worry about everything and do nothing.
     You have envy issues
     You have ‘’complex issues’’. Either superiority complex or inferiority complex.
     You find it difficult to be yourself and you’re always putting on a front.



Here is checklist of someone who possesses High self esteem

     You don’t seek approval or validation
     You don’t obsessively worry about how others will judge you.
     Your life is enriched with each new encounters.
     You are nicer to be around.
     Your ideas are met with interest because others want to hear what you have to say.
     You make a good leader!
     You appreciate life and are willing to try new things -you are magnets to positive opportunities!
     You have less mental health problems
     You have less issues with other people because you are content with who they are

GET RID OF LOW SELF ESTEEM

Low self-esteem can result in feeling out of control and feeling like a victim ignored, excluded, unimportant, insignificant and unloved. 

Low self-esteem can lead to internalising the criticism of others (taking it to heart) while searching constantly for validation. This can lead to chronic people pleasing and it will give others too much power to determine how we feel.  Ive been in this season in my life before and it was horrible. This in turn can lead to being a doormat for other people's benefit.



LOVE YOU

When you truly love yourself for who you are, with all your strengths and weaknesses and truly accept yourself then you have high self esteem….

So that's the end of my blog post for now. Is your self-esteem high? How do you maintain it?
Thank you for stopping by and please share with others that may benefit. 

PREVIOUS BLOG ON SELF-ESTEEM
PRACTICE OF HIGH SELF-ESTEEM